Great News and a Move

So this week has been pretty wonderful!

I got some great "news" from my doctor. We have decided to go ahead with surgery. Hopefully it will happen at the first of the year. To me this is amazing because it has been such a long time coming. It's still not an answer and I'm still going to be going to tons of doctors appts but it's a start..one that I have been praying for, for a very long time! God has blessed me so much. I know that I have gone through this journey for a reason and although I don't always understand, I continue to trust in Him and His plan!

I am also moving!!!! This part is very exciting for me. Kason and Jase both got jobs back up north and I have decided to move to White Deer. It's so much closer to all of my family and friends and I'm over joyed about the idea. Sure WD is a super small town without a Walmart or much of anything, but it's still exciting for me.

I have been packing and trying to get ready for the move, which I decided to do less then two weeks ago! Mom and Colby are being awesome and coming down to help with the move. Love them for that!

So a lot of new and wonderful things are happening! I can't stop thanking my wonderful God for His many blessings!! Life is great!

Home :)

So I was able to go home this past week. My grandmother has been really sick and the doctors weren't sure if she was going to be ok, so I went home to spend some time with her. I love my G funk in the hood (she hates that, but it cracks me up)! She is such an amazing woman. We were able to talk about life and all that had been going on. Mom told me last night she doesn't remember me being there, but that is ok because she warmed my heart just seeing her!

While I was there I was also able to spend a little time with my mom and Kreed. Of course Kreed is too concerned with what is going on in his little world that I'm not sure he even noticed I was there until I was telling him goodbye..haha. But it's always great to see family!!

I was also able to some great friends..love being able to do that! After my weekend in Booker I went and stayed with my friend Chelsey for a few days. We had a really great time catching up and spending time together..although I was injured while I was there! Have a small fracture in my foot but it should be better in a few days! I'll post some pics of what happened. It's not pretty!

But anyways..being able to go home was so great! I miss my family and friends so much!! Can't wait for the holidays!!!

This is what happens when a table and two men land on your foot

This is the following day

And this is what happens after all of that!

Frustrations and Faith

So after hearing back from my doctor that she couldn't find anything wrong with me, the frustration set in. I feel like I have been going non stop for the past year and a half working so hard to find out why my body has freaked out and done what it has done. I thought for sure that this doctor would have the answers. She is considered the best in her field in the state of Texas. She comes highly recommended and every doctor prior to her said wonderful things about her abilities to take the hardest cases and solve them. So I was stoked when I went to see her. I just knew for sure that this is where I needed to be. But...nothing. Still no answers. So the frustration and thought of just throwing in the towel consumed my thoughts. I was done..no more. At that moment, prayer was far from my thoughts. I was mad, angry and upset.

Now onto the faith part. I have been attending a weekly Bible study at my church. We are doing Beth Moore's "Believing God." I have a great group of women in my small group. I told them about my troubles and like many people that are apart of my life, they have been praying for me, even when I haven't been! So we are on week 3 of the study. The name of the study is "Believing God can do what He says He can do." Day twos study is "All Shapes and Sizes." This weeks study talks about miracles. She talked about the many miracles God performed both in the New and Old Testament. She talked about the miracles she had seen in her own life and asked us to talk about the ones we have seen in our own life. I know God is powerful and He has done many wonderful things to people in my life. Take my grandmother for example. This past week they thought she might have cancer located in her chest. They went to do a biopsy and came out saying the spot was gone. That is a miracle! So while I was working through the second day of the study I started to think about what was going on with me. Now I want to point out that I'm not asking God for a miracle, but I'm also not saying that God wouldn't be willing to perform one for me as well. A few things throught the study hit me hard. I'll list a few of these statements Beth made in this study:

*God is pleased when we exercise faith
*God reads every petition we make on the tablets of our hearts
*Sometimes God may priorititze the faith required to continue trusting Him when we don't get what we ask over the faith required to receive it.
*We live in a fallen world where every human being suffers to some extent
*Our suffering need never be in vain. As we allow God to minister to us in our fiery trails, He is glorified, the church is edified, and we are qualified for greater reward.
*You can't lose when you earnestly seek God. Even if you don't find the answer, you find the Author


So after reading what Beth had to say I was like WOW. All of this time I have been so consumed with what the doctors had to say. My frustration has taken over and instead of giving it fully to God, I have put my fate in other's hands. The last statement: You can't lose when you earnestly seek God. Even if you don't find the answer, you find the Author. How true is that?!? I have so wanted an answer and instead of looking to God and realizing that through all of this, answers might not have been given, but because of what has been going on, I have found the Author and I wouldn't change that.

I know that I have a long road ahead still. Answers will come when God knows I am truley ready to hear them. I just need to let go and let God and trust that my suffering is never in vain and that sometimes God may priorititze the faith required to continue trusting Him when I don't get what I ask over the faith required to receive it. God nows the petetion I have on my heart and who's hands are better to have them in?

To end, Beth had us read Psalms 146 in the first person, as if we were the one saying it. When I did this, I broke into tears. It was so powerful and so true and just reminded me how wonderful a God I have in my life and how that I am so blessed that He chose to love me! Here is the verse. Try reading it in first person..it's amazing!!!


Psalms 146:

Praise the LORD!
Praise the LORD, O my soul!
I will praise the LORD as long as I live!
I will sing praises to my God as long as I exist!
Do not trust in princess, or in human beings, who cannot deliever!
Their life's breath departs, they return to the ground; on that day their plans die.
How happy is the one whose helper is the God of Jacob,
whose hope is in the LORD his God,
the one who made heaven and earth,
the sea, and all that is in them,
who remains forever faithful,
vindicates the oppressed,
and gives food to the hungry.
The LORD releases the imprisoned.
The LORD gives sight to the blind.
The LORD lifts up all who are bent over.
The LORD loves the godly.
The LORD protects those residing outside their native land;
he lifts up the fatherless and the widow,
but he opposes the wicked.
The LORD rules forever,
your God, O Zion, throughout the generation to come!
Praise the LORD!


Have a wonderful week!